Taken from my black, leather journal - the one with a handwritten note from one of my favorite people, Jake Walden. Written on June 15th, 2012 1:05 A.M.
This was written late at night and some of it is nonsensical rambling, but I'm going to try not to edit myself - Jake told me not too.
"I'm fascinated by the paths we take and the marks we make throughout our lives. The ones we follow, altering slightly to fit into ourselves, and the ones we create, scouting uncharted territory for others to follow one day.
You throw a penny into a fountain one day and, just think, that tiny piece of yourself will always be there even when you're so far away and have forgotten.
I carved my name in a tree in Central Park - THE Central Park - this year. And, just think, someone right now could be carving next to it, someone I will probably never meet but whose path will have grazed mine, if only for a second, as they read my message, 'Kay '12', all that I was able to write with the tiny fingernail clipper I dug out of the bottom of my purse.
And all this makes me sad because then you have the paths that collide, the people you meet, the people who make you laugh but all too often those paths and those people only stay for a short time until they're crossing and continuing on, no longer on the same trail as you. And that's sad because they've left a mark, some darker and more present than others, but all too soon we'll forget and let them fade.
Imagine a world where we left a trail everywhere we went, a brilliant color all our own that would mix and run with other colors as paths crossed. Just imagine all the places life has taken you and, just, what if you could leave a mark everywhere, remembering everything you've seen, everything you've touched. Everyone you met.
Whether you're in a pub you can't remember the name of in the middle -the heart - of NYC eating the best pasta you've ever had or stopping in a random Walgreens in Columbus, Ohio to pick up Jolly Ranchers, or retouching your makeup in the bathroom of a random convention center in a random city, it's like, what if you could see, really see, who's been there before and who comes after. Wouldn't it be amazing to see a world like that? So colorful, so connected.
I think if it was tangible like that maybe we'd realize just how alike we really are. That we share this life as one, that my life is so neatly tied to and connected to everyone around me at any given second.
It's just, life is a bunch of what ifs, chance encounters, close calls, and coincidences, but no one fully takes the time to appreciate that. I don't even know if I'm making sense anymore."
Stay fabulous.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Positive
I dressed up to go to work today. This is something I rarely do but I was feeling good and wanted to look the part. And I don't even mind how slow today is, it's given me time to think.
I'm a strong believer in karma and the Universe rewarding and punishing us for our actions so I'm hoping for good karma soon.
It's almost like everything is piecing itself together at the most inopportune time. Things are finally good - I have the best group of friends there is, a job that I complain about but is actually the best job a lazy teenager could ask for, I'm busy at school but its worth it and I'm proud of the work I'm doing, I've never felt so in-tune with my creativity; it's all I can think about - but in just a few months all this is going to be gone. In a few months I'm graduating high school and everything is going to change. And I'm scared.
I'm not sure what my future is going to hold. I want nothing more than to go to NYC and just do it. To dive right into the life I know I was destined to have in the city I know I was destined to be a part of. But that's scary. I'd be going alone, without a single safety net. Maybe I should just stay home for a few years and go to the local university. But Kayla what if you get stuck here? That's my biggest fear. And back and forth and back and forth.
Everyone keeps telling me to stop worrying - everything will work itself out. But as strong a believer I am in the Universe, I know you have to help yourself before it helps you. And here's where I get lost. I just don't know what to do. About anything. And I wonder if everyone is like me.
In the mean time, I'm trying to hold onto all the positive vibes that I can.
Stay Fabulous.
I'm a strong believer in karma and the Universe rewarding and punishing us for our actions so I'm hoping for good karma soon.
It's almost like everything is piecing itself together at the most inopportune time. Things are finally good - I have the best group of friends there is, a job that I complain about but is actually the best job a lazy teenager could ask for, I'm busy at school but its worth it and I'm proud of the work I'm doing, I've never felt so in-tune with my creativity; it's all I can think about - but in just a few months all this is going to be gone. In a few months I'm graduating high school and everything is going to change. And I'm scared.
I'm not sure what my future is going to hold. I want nothing more than to go to NYC and just do it. To dive right into the life I know I was destined to have in the city I know I was destined to be a part of. But that's scary. I'd be going alone, without a single safety net. Maybe I should just stay home for a few years and go to the local university. But Kayla what if you get stuck here? That's my biggest fear. And back and forth and back and forth.
Everyone keeps telling me to stop worrying - everything will work itself out. But as strong a believer I am in the Universe, I know you have to help yourself before it helps you. And here's where I get lost. I just don't know what to do. About anything. And I wonder if everyone is like me.
In the mean time, I'm trying to hold onto all the positive vibes that I can.
Stay Fabulous.
Monday, October 1, 2012
Bob Dylan, Homecoming not-so-Queen, & Rocky Horror
I've been up to some rather fun things lately.
My bestfriend Josh & I went to see Bob Dylan several? a few? weeks ago (I can't keep track of time these days - not room in my brain!) and it was incredible. I decided it was something I had to do before I - or Bob, cause really which is more likely? - died. He didn't sound that great, but it's Bob freaking Dylan, yanno? I witnessed a man pee in public, a man with one leg hop up and down, and a 70-something year old man ride around on a scooter (the kid kind not the old people kind, duh). What you're supposed to be gathering from this is that good music reaches all types of people.
Moving on....
I was on my school's Homecoming court and although I didn't win Queen or Princess, my two bestfriends on the court did, so I'm happy for them (wait, who said bitter?). Here's a picture of me & my wonderful escort Logan:
My bestfriend Josh & I went to see Bob Dylan several? a few? weeks ago (I can't keep track of time these days - not room in my brain!) and it was incredible. I decided it was something I had to do before I - or Bob, cause really which is more likely? - died. He didn't sound that great, but it's Bob freaking Dylan, yanno? I witnessed a man pee in public, a man with one leg hop up and down, and a 70-something year old man ride around on a scooter (the kid kind not the old people kind, duh). What you're supposed to be gathering from this is that good music reaches all types of people.
Moving on....
I was on my school's Homecoming court and although I didn't win Queen or Princess, my two bestfriends on the court did, so I'm happy for them (wait, who said bitter?). Here's a picture of me & my wonderful escort Logan:
Last but not least, The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Meet Magenta, Columbia, Frank-n-Furter, and Janet.
STAY FABULOUS!
UPDATE- I AM NOT DEAD
Okay lovelies, I know what you're thinking...I haven't blogged in AGES. Please understand this is a very, VERY busy time for me and I have a lot on my plate.
For instance, as Editor-in-Chief of my school's newspaper, I've been dealing with a staff composed of less-than-stellar writers (not you, Josh) - who I will admit have a lot of heart - and an entirely new design program that's job seems to be making my life a living hell. On top of that, Debate season is starting and we are NO where near ready for that. And the resolution absolutely blows. If I hear/see the words moral obligation one more time I may finally snap.
Don't even get me started on college. It's too scary and I'm going to ignore it for as long as possible.
Enough complaining...
I'm going to try to get back on the blog wagon because I really need to accomplish something these days, so be looking for some posts pretty soon!
As always,
Stay fabulous.
P.S. Aforementioned Josh has started a blog of his own. Check it out here.
For instance, as Editor-in-Chief of my school's newspaper, I've been dealing with a staff composed of less-than-stellar writers (not you, Josh) - who I will admit have a lot of heart - and an entirely new design program that's job seems to be making my life a living hell. On top of that, Debate season is starting and we are NO where near ready for that. And the resolution absolutely blows. If I hear/see the words moral obligation one more time I may finally snap.
Don't even get me started on college. It's too scary and I'm going to ignore it for as long as possible.
Enough complaining...
I'm going to try to get back on the blog wagon because I really need to accomplish something these days, so be looking for some posts pretty soon!
As always,
Stay fabulous.
P.S. Aforementioned Josh has started a blog of his own. Check it out here.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Politics
It's President Obama's birthday today. Happy Birthday!
In other news,
Mitt Romney is in my hometown today. Eating at a local BBQ place.
In conclusion,
Life is weird.
Also:
Stay Fabulous!
In other news,
Mitt Romney is in my hometown today. Eating at a local BBQ place.
In conclusion,
Life is weird.
Also:
Stay Fabulous!
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
It's not about a chicken sandwich...
I'm pretty sure anyone who knows me knew this was coming sooner or later. So here it is: my take on the Chick-fil-A controversy.
I'd like to start off saying that I've done lots of research on this topic, because if there's one thing that irritates me it's when someone tries to give their opinion on something they know nothing about. Here's what I've found:
It's no secret that Chick-fil-A was founded on religious principals. Dan Cathy, the company's founder, stated that they don't claim to be a Christian organization but their establishments stand on a foundation strongly rooted in the Bible. So yeah, same thing. The controversary began, however, when Cathy was asked his opinion on gay marriage. His answer, I assume, is obvious. This, however, is NOT where the issue lies. Of course, members of the gay community and those that support weren't particularly happy about a CEO of a major corporation voicing his opposition to something they've been fighting tooth and nail for, but hey, freedom of speech, right? That's his opinion, he's entitled to it. The end.
Unfortunately, it wasn't the end. After Cathy's public announcement, it also came to light that the company had been donating millions and millions of dollars every year to anti-gay organizations. Not only that, but they've also been donating to ex-gay organizations such as Exodus International, which according to its website, "is the world's largest ministry to individuals and families impacted by homosexuality." By donating money to organizations like these, Dan Cathy is making a clear statement that he and his company are not only against gay marriage, they are against gay existence. And furthermore, it's no longer just a man stating his opinion, no longer a man simply exercising his rights of freedom of religion or speech, it's now a man going out of his way to oppress an entire people. These kinds of 'opinions' shouldn't just be let slide. They are dangerous to millions of people. Dangerous to the same-sex couple that isn't allowed a marriage license or the thousands of rights granted to a married couple because people use their personal beliefs or faith to deny them their human rights. Dangerous to the children that are forced into counseling by their parents to change something about themselves they have no control over because some people can't look past their religions and prejudices to accept, or at least tolerate, things they don't understand.
The Declaration of Independence states that all people are endowed by their Creator-hey, that means God-with certain unalienable rights and among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. One can't honestly think that by donating to anti-/ex-gay organizations you aren't going out of your way to try and take away those unalienable rights from other people. People whose 'opinions' don't coincide with your own.
When you begin to take actual action to ensure a person is discriminated or oppressed, you are no longer simply stating your opinion. You are a bigot, intolerant, and hateful. Let me give you an example. I'm not big on organized religion. In fact, I don't like it for many, many reasons. But that's my opinion and I'm entitled to it, right? However, I would never want to rally against ones freedom to worship whatever god, being, statue, they wanted, however they wanted. And if I began campaigns to close churches or went out of my way to try and stop people from praying, then I'd be a bigot, intolerant, and hateful.
So you see, when I hear people complaining about activists getting angry with Chick-fil-A, screaming about freedom of speech and religion, making points of eating at the restuaraunt because of what's happened, I can't help but get upset. We aren't angry about one man's opinions on gay marriage. We aren't angry about a chicken sandwich-as some so cleverly put.
You're allowed to agree with Dan Cathy in thinking gay marriage is wrong or immoral or against your religion. You just aren't allowed to take away the rights of those who disagree. I, for one, will not allow my money to be used to oppress and I hope you won't either.
I'd like to start off saying that I've done lots of research on this topic, because if there's one thing that irritates me it's when someone tries to give their opinion on something they know nothing about. Here's what I've found:
It's no secret that Chick-fil-A was founded on religious principals. Dan Cathy, the company's founder, stated that they don't claim to be a Christian organization but their establishments stand on a foundation strongly rooted in the Bible. So yeah, same thing. The controversary began, however, when Cathy was asked his opinion on gay marriage. His answer, I assume, is obvious. This, however, is NOT where the issue lies. Of course, members of the gay community and those that support weren't particularly happy about a CEO of a major corporation voicing his opposition to something they've been fighting tooth and nail for, but hey, freedom of speech, right? That's his opinion, he's entitled to it. The end.
Unfortunately, it wasn't the end. After Cathy's public announcement, it also came to light that the company had been donating millions and millions of dollars every year to anti-gay organizations. Not only that, but they've also been donating to ex-gay organizations such as Exodus International, which according to its website, "is the world's largest ministry to individuals and families impacted by homosexuality." By donating money to organizations like these, Dan Cathy is making a clear statement that he and his company are not only against gay marriage, they are against gay existence. And furthermore, it's no longer just a man stating his opinion, no longer a man simply exercising his rights of freedom of religion or speech, it's now a man going out of his way to oppress an entire people. These kinds of 'opinions' shouldn't just be let slide. They are dangerous to millions of people. Dangerous to the same-sex couple that isn't allowed a marriage license or the thousands of rights granted to a married couple because people use their personal beliefs or faith to deny them their human rights. Dangerous to the children that are forced into counseling by their parents to change something about themselves they have no control over because some people can't look past their religions and prejudices to accept, or at least tolerate, things they don't understand.
The Declaration of Independence states that all people are endowed by their Creator-hey, that means God-with certain unalienable rights and among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. One can't honestly think that by donating to anti-/ex-gay organizations you aren't going out of your way to try and take away those unalienable rights from other people. People whose 'opinions' don't coincide with your own.
When you begin to take actual action to ensure a person is discriminated or oppressed, you are no longer simply stating your opinion. You are a bigot, intolerant, and hateful. Let me give you an example. I'm not big on organized religion. In fact, I don't like it for many, many reasons. But that's my opinion and I'm entitled to it, right? However, I would never want to rally against ones freedom to worship whatever god, being, statue, they wanted, however they wanted. And if I began campaigns to close churches or went out of my way to try and stop people from praying, then I'd be a bigot, intolerant, and hateful.
So you see, when I hear people complaining about activists getting angry with Chick-fil-A, screaming about freedom of speech and religion, making points of eating at the restuaraunt because of what's happened, I can't help but get upset. We aren't angry about one man's opinions on gay marriage. We aren't angry about a chicken sandwich-as some so cleverly put.
You're allowed to agree with Dan Cathy in thinking gay marriage is wrong or immoral or against your religion. You just aren't allowed to take away the rights of those who disagree. I, for one, will not allow my money to be used to oppress and I hope you won't either.
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